Serendipity

Using what I was taught in Digital Signal Processing, where the Information content of a signal received, is directly proportional to what is Not expected, I realized and am going to explain why I get stirred more by classical music as compared to commercial music.

Giving a piano players technical point of view, in commercial music it is easy to decipher the bass clef (left hand chords) once you know what scale the piece is played on, and what the treble clef(right hand notes) is.

Now this is applicable obviously to not only pianists, but anybody listening to the music. In layman's terms, in commercial music, subconsciously you sort of know whats coming.The information content is just whats there in the melody, and not in the bass, hence the information content gets reduced to half.The expected part of it stems from those involuntary brain cells which act up sometimes, and what we call instinct.

In classical music, the bass notes are totally unexpected, and they compliment the treble beautifully. Unless you see and hear and play the notes, there’s no way you know what’s supposed to be coming your way.

Whats unexpected and pleasant, catches my attention more than otherwise. Its serendipity. I love what it does to me.

This sudden realization happened while trying to play this piece to myself called Traumerei. Tis lovely.

This is vladimir horowitz's (who i only came to know about through youtube) version of it:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qq7ncjhSqtk

Not so ordinary

Today I accidentally jumped out of my usual energy level and transcended into another level while listening to this young village boy (of grade 5 piano) playing the piano.
I’ve heard a lot of people play, grade 8 students, teachers, performers etc, but have NEVER been as enchanted.

I was sitting at my piano class, trying to finish that theory workbook, feeling silly about it because it was obviously meant for really small kids and yet I made mistakes, when this young boy started practicing his piece ( Fantasia in D minor by Mozart) on the piano. He was utterly depressed because he probably thought that he couldn’t get it right. So while he was fiddling around, his fingers just dwindling on the keys, while waiting for the teacher, grumbling and sulking to himself, I discovered a new found emotion in me. So far I had only read in books how people get mesmerized. It was fantastic , his fingers had magic in them, and he didn’t know it.

My teacher told me later that in her whole musical career she’d only come across 2 such musical people in her life, and one of whom became so arrogant because of praise, that he almost lost his touch. So this poor boy was creating magic with his music, while he was being told that it was all rubbish. Infact he was made to take a walk around the area(birla temple in ballygunge) and come back, to get over his depression and to get some fresh air.

Makes one realize how ordinary we are.

The story of you, the ganges, and I.

Love flows deep in rivers.

So lazy.

I had the laziest day in the history of planet earth today, starting from the tertamezazoic era.Its possible that a few of those dinosaurs were lazier than this.
Its 9 pm and i havent had a bath or washed my face.
Ive watched 2 movies and played 4 games of scrabble.
Thats it.
All done right from this spot on the couch.
I think its possible that my skins gotten fused with the couch material.
Somebody help me out of here.

guilty?

I saw this movie last night called blood diamond. It left me in a sour mood and with a sour taste in my mouth.

Its about the civil war in Sierra Leone which started because diamonds were discovered in this area which both the government and the Rebels (locals) want control over. The Rebels use the revenue from these diamonds to further fund the war, by buying sopisticated arms and training (even underage) locals, hence causing more bloodshed.These diamonds are termed conflict diamonds and they say that this problem has been solved to a large extent by curbing the sales of these conflict diamonds,by certain international governing bodies,but not entirely.

After having watched the movie a lot of people said that "now I never want to buy a diamond" but I wonder if the war started because of the buyers' vanity or whether the war just feeds on it. This sort of a civil war had happened before because of ivory and other things as well, so I cannot help but blame the people in question rather than the diamonds.

And the moment had arrived

I finally quit my job. I did it.

I was subconsciously waiting for a day when I would be extremely happy, and know for sure that its not homesickness or any deeprooted sadness which was causing all this drama in my head and making me want to quit.
So one fine day, when my niece laughed all morning just because she saw me eating toast, and I saw a girl with a wedgie at the food court, I just knew that the moment had arrived. I couldnt be happier, had not laughed so much in a while, and I decided to summon the authorities immediately and tell them to find themselves a replacement for me.
Slept like a baby that night.

People often tell me that I'm going to regret my decision, but as the days pass, my instinct grows stronger and tells me that I made the right move. It may just be plain rebellion but as long as there isnt a doubt in my mind.

I must confess that a couple of fortune tellers and well wishers told me that I shouldnt quit before such and such date, and that did affect my decision. I wholeheartedly went against their advice and it gave me immense pleasure in doing so. I dont wish to undermine their clairvoyance here, its possible that they knew how well reverse psychology would work with me.

I have no clue whats to follow next. I dont even want to clutter my head with options. Its going to be complete vaccuum for the next few months, till sudden inspiration takes over and enlightens me about what should be done next.

I know how you feel calvin

is this my quarterlife crisis?

I've recently discovered that having nothing to do at work is not as much fun as i thought it would be. Nevertheless, it is educational as i learn more from the internet.I spent an entire afternoon looking up information about pianos and i discovered that there are so many rules about scales, notations etc which i was clueless about, even though i claim to have learnt western classical piano (on and off) since the age of 9. I also realized that to be able to afford the piano of my dreams ( a bluthner baby grand ),I would definitely have to quit infosys and start making a new plan.

Sometimes i cannot decide whether having gone into this line was a terrible mistake. I know i'm secure about my job, and that people in conventional society think of me well and it always makes me feel cool to be a technogeek, but that sums up all the benefits which this job could offer.

I know that being really good at this job will not give me as much pleasure as being really good at an artform.Its bizarre how badly i want to be good at dance/martial arts/vocals/piano/art etc etc and how i really really dont care about how good i am at my job.

Now the question that i'm faced with is whether it is possible to excel at something alongside work (which takes up 80% of my time) or whether i should take a risk,quit and do whatever i please...and eventually discover what is it that i really need to do to exhaust all my creative and nervous energy.I wish something would happen...an inspirational flash...a sudden miraculous adrenalin rush or anything at all... which helps me make up my mind and get me out of this dilemma.

Spent a fruitful weekend in bombay. Went n watched this dreadful movie called Poseidon and just when i thought it couldnt get worse i saw yet another movie called "jarhead".
Apart from that i accidentally did this musical theater workshop which incredibly enough i really enjoyed! We're dancing to roxanne. I didnt think I was capable of melodrama but apparently I am. Although its going to take me a while to figure out why people enjoy performing on stage with a million scrutinizing eyes on them;when they're at their utmost state of vulnerability,venting and digging out emotions which really shouldnt be made public, and with stark lights bringing into view all the areas in your body you wouldnt want to emphasise upon. The bizarre thing is that i loved it too.
Just out of curiosity i also did a jazz workshop which was a good workout more than anything else...i always thought that jazz was about all those strange men with painted faces and bodysuits enacting expressions in mime but turns out i was mistaken.
Now its back to monday morning and a good whole week of staring at my comp screen at work and waiting for something interesting to happen around me. Anything god please...aliens, shark attacks, blizzards, powercuts....I cant take 5 days of inactivity!!